IIT Despos, Orkut, SP-Election Manifesto...

What is the use of Orkut?




Ask this question to a IITdespo and he will treat you as if you have asked him the use of Chlormint.
As commonly used in Hindi, “Hum chlormint kyon khate hain?”
Let me list some of the benefits of eating chlormint:
1. After drinking liquor, or smoking cigarette (sutta). FYI, I don’t smoke or drink liquor. (if it concerns you!!!)
2. When you are on a date and it’s pretty obvious that you’ll have to.... I hope you get it.
3. And of course, you happen to like chlormint because of minty taste...which is least probable. However, I cannot rule it out completely as I even loved “Mahalacto”, when I was a kid. Did you also like it?
So, moral of this is never ever dare to ask a despo about the use of Orkut. Orkut and despos are heavily dependent on each other.
Hello, mate!!! Who is a despo?
Duh!!! Don’t ask this. You could be kicked for such negligence. Remember ignorance is never bliss. However, if you already have surrendered to my blog I must oblige you with the meaning of Despo.
Despo is such a guyor IITian who is in search of a girlfriend and desperately is hunting for the fairer sex but despise all his effort is still single and ready to mingle.
An average despo spends his most of the time loitering around girls’ hostel when he is offline and uses Orkut to hook up with some orkut-girl with foolish pickup lines. These pickup lines are often learnt similar to subscribing some feeds of Daily quotes' websites/blogs.
What does a Despo do at orkut?
He logs in to his orkut account, checks his scrapbook which never increases unless some old-friend scraps him “Abe Scrap kyun nahi karte?”, “Hi, Wassup” and all these useless scraps to which he replies within nanoseconds... after this he goes to few communities, hunts for female profiles, sends them friend requests using some pickup lines, then comes the most important part, he also has to go to his crush’s profile to read her scraps and check her album. These guys strive in a countably infinite no. of loop in such activities until they become a non-despo (highly probable) or committed by the gift of Orkut (very rare).
The desponess can be checked by asking some decent looking female orkut user about the type and number of friend requests she gets.
Some common pick up lines are:
1. If I could rearrange the alphabets then I would put u and I together.
2. You must be the reason for global warming because you are hot.
3. Did it hurt when u fell from heaven?
4. Is your dad a terrorist? Because you are a big bomb.

You can also check this screenshot by Ramya



This guy says "I'm a male....LOL"
I’ve a bad news for all these despos.
Samajwadi Party has recently released its election-2009 manifesto. They want to stop the use of computers in offices, and English because these two things are leading to reduction in jobs of less skilled people.
These despos should at least do something to save our country from these idiots who want to stop all our blogs, orkut profiles, use of English, and then they might say to use bullock-carts. How does an experienced but not necessarily literate group of politicians can come out with such a foolish, ill-researched election manifesto?
These less known politicians have just one mantra. Let the poor, uneducated common mass remain the same so that they can continually misguide them to secure a vote bank.
I appeal you despos, please do something not for country’s well-being but for yourself too.

PS: I have updated my other story blog "The Three Nerds"...read it from here.
PS: My Exams are starting from 20th April.
PS: I'll become 50% Engineer, if everything goes all right.
PS: Bye